So what's been going on with me?

I am in one of those churn-n-burn phases that I often go through. Lots and lots of things going on inside of me and around me. Accepting things I can not change is a tough thing for me sometimes even though I know there is such freedom at the other side of the acceptance. I often go through the stages of grief in these situations depending on, of course, the magnitude of it all.

According to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross the stages of grief are: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and finally Acceptance. I discovered her and her works at the age of 16 when I was forced to cope with the death of my grandfather. Even though she applied these stages to any form of catastrophic personal loss, any significant personal change can elicit these stages.

I found liberty to allow myself to experience the stages and ultimately healing in reference to the loss of my grandfather. I have utilized my knowledge of the stages many many times since. It is said that the only constant is change. I have found that to ring true in my own life and the lives of my loved ones. There is comfort in knowing what to expect in the grieving process.

I often grieve the loss of expectations or dreams. Reality is often a hard pill to swallow. So in repsonse to "so, what's been going on with me is? is simply this: I am grieving the loss of a handful of expectations and dreams right now. I am in the depression stage. I look forward to reaching acceptance where I will finally have peace.

Jesus,

There seems to be much in my life lately that I cannot control. I am glad that I know You, Who controls it all. I need You. I need You more and more with each passing day. Please help me transition through all the upcoming changes. Please help me keep my eyes on You, the Author and Perfector of my faith-the One Who is and Who was and Who is to come. Jesus, my Rock, my Fortress, my Savior, my Healer, my Righteousness, my Provider. My life is in You. This is but another humbling experience to draw me closer to You. And I welcome anything that does that. I know You will be with me through it every step of the way. Amen.

This prayer came from here. Please take some time and do yourself a favor. Go visit this blog. She is so real, so open, so honest. I find inspiration to keep on keeping on almost everytime I visit. I thank God for putting her in my path, a fellow female traveler on the same journey.