Found great joy in the discovery!

Betty just gave me this award:). Thanx, Sweetie!

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I read a post this week and the final line of it impacted me greatly.

May you be blessed this week. Perhaps you will get to see something new in yourself or someone you love, and may you find great joy in the discovery!

What a wonderful thing to wish upon some one! I took those beautiful words personally and made a mental note to self that I would let Nicole know just what things I see new in me or others this week and how much fun I have reveling in the joy of doing so. To that end here are my observations:

First and foremost I want to thank Nicole from the bottom of my heart. I doubt that she realized the impact those heart-felt words would have on someone who has never met her. She did, infact, give me a wonderful gift. Thank you, dear one.

As I am convinced that I am a spiritual being having a physical experience, I have viewed my life as part of the circle which I believe goes something like this...spirit in heaven with Heavenly Father, spirit into body for physical experience, spirit returns to heaven. While I am here I am to do my best to honor My Father and positively impact all those I come in contact with. This journey has not always been a pleasant one and, even though there were times I am sure I could have been labled a slow learner, I did eventually catch on to many of the important things not the least of which is that I very much enjoy discovering new things about myself and I do revel in the joy of doing so.

Paying attention to what is going on inside of me is important to my spiritual and mental growth. Again there is a cycle: have revelation, accept it, decide what to do with and/or about it. One of the biggest revelations of my adult life came in the aftermath of my 23 year old brother's death in 1992. Due to our upbringing I was more of a mom to my four brothers than I was a sister. Even once I had children of my own I continued to worry about the health and well-being of my siblings. Donnie was killed in a motorcycle accident on a Sunday afternoon. That night was the first time in my life that I went to bed and did not worry about my brothers. I prayed for their safety and then left it in God's capable hands. All of that worrying had availed me nothing. Time for a new plan to be implemented.

So, this week, I realized some things about myself and I wish to not only share them but to commit here in Blogland to the new plans that I am implementing in response to each of them.

1. I do not like doing mending of garments for other people. I do not even like doing mending of garments for myself. Why do I have the following items here that I agreed to mend:

A. Jacket for Dave that needs a button moved
B. Shorts for John that have the butt ripped out
C. Shirt for Brandon that has a rip in the sleeve
D. Hoodie for Jen that needs zipper replaced.
E. Nightgown for Gail that needs sleeves altered.
F. Pants for Jen that need a patch on the hiney and one on the knee.

2. I do not like sewing for other people. Why do I have the following here to sew:

A. Two nightgowns for Gail
B. Baby blanket for her grand baby(at her request)
C. Patterns and fabric for jammie bottoms & boxer for my kids next year Christmas gifts
D. Assorted negligee's for me that need finishing

3. I do not like the quilting part of making quilts. I thoroughly enjoy the thinking process, the molesting and purchasing of fabric, the cutting and piecing of the top. The excitement stops there. Why do I have the following here:

A. Ten quilt tops in dire need of being quilted and bound...one of which is 13 years in the waiting
B. A quilt frame and machine that cost me $898.00 and is currently collecting dust

4. Because I do not like the stress caused by having things that should be done here are the plans that are being implemented. Before the last day of April, I will mend every item that is here and return them to their rightful owners. In the future I will only mend items that can be done immediately while the person is standing here with me. Otherwise, I will politely refuse. I will not commit to sew anything for anyone. I will continue to make gifts for people as I am moved to do so. The girls have plenty of jammie bottoms made so far and it was rediculous for me to think I could make them each a set for every holiday. They will get what is already made for Christmas next year. The guys may end up with gift-certicates to the mall. I have to make a final decision concerning the quilter. I am considering offering it in a trade to someone who will quilt my currently finished tops in exchange for it. Baby blankets will be made in advance. I love making them. They can also be tack-quilted and if I place a ruffle around the edge they can be "birthed and knotted" as opposed to quilted and bound. I will make them when I have 'nothing to do' and at my leisure.

There is such amazing freedom in knowing who I am and what I do and do not like. what I am willing or unwilling to sacrifice, and what brings me joy and what causes me stress. I have been learning this for quite some time. There is one final situation that I handled two days ago. I have a dear friend who is currently, at age 54, finishing up her college requirements in order to graduate. She has a project due tomorrow that is worth one-third of her final grade and solicited my help over a month ago. There was a time when I would have thoroughly enjoyed the challenge and the process. That time is long passed. Her professor looked at the paper and basically said it had to be re-done. Ok, I am not in college for many reasons - one of which is that I do not need any additional pressure to perform. I told my friend that, while I love her dearly, I am NOT in college, and this is my very last project.

Over the next few months, I can see many benefits to implementing these plans. The immediate benefit is that I feel good having a plan. Next, there will be less stuff cluttering my mind and my house. Possibly, the people who get their promised goods from me will be so excited to get them that they will forget how long it took for that to happen. Finally, there will be less daily stress and that is a wonderful goal!

Having said all of this, I must leave you. There is a soon-to-be 'birthed, ruffled, and tacked' baby blankie that is calling my name! Oh, and I promise to giggle while doing it:).

As I go, I would like to leave you with this blessing: May you be blessed this week. Perhaps you will get to see something new in yourself or someone you love, and may you find great joy in the discovery!